3 how-to-talk-to-your-boss tips

Hierarchies can be difficult. As Dwight Morrow said: “The world is divided into people who do things – and people who get the credit.”

The hierarchies in organisations have to mean something. Current trends may be towards flatter organisation structures and more informal styles, but senior people are, well, senior. In this article we gathered some basic tips on what to keep in mind when chatting with your boss. Don’t miss this communication advice.

1. The importance of timing

One important overall factor when it comes to a successful communication with senior people is timing. Let’s think about two different possibilities:

People communicate with you

One philosophy follows the old adage that if a senior person says Jump! Then the only response is to ask: How high? But is this always right and do senior people always expect it? There are certainly occasions when the right reaction to a “summons” is to stall. You may want to finish something more important (or let them decide which is most important) or to have time to prepare for whatever the discussion will be about.

TIP: So, be prepared to stand up for yourself; be polite but be prepared to be firm (you may not always succeed, but you may achieve a surprisingly good rate of strike).

You communicate with others

Here one rule is clear: Always choose your moment – carefully.

There is a balance to be struck. Insist too much – But I must see you today! – And, even if they agree, you may find that you have given yourself a very difficult meeting (time is short and their mind is on other things). Leave things too long and the moment passes, the project has run on too long or, perhaps worst of all, the problem has got worse. In the latter case you are on a hiding to nothing, saying: But I’ve been trying to get to see you for days only makes matters worse. And a response such as: If you’d told me what it was about then I’m sure I would have set a time also just puts you in the wrong.

2. The power of listening

No senior person wants misunderstandings. They do not want to hear: I’m not quite sure what you meant … and they do not want any confusion resulting from their contact with you to waste any of their time.

As a result it is important to:

• Listen: really listen (see checklist shown below)

• If in doubt, ask: and do so immediately (going back at the end of a meeting and querying something casts doubt on your total understanding)

• Recap if necessary: a quick statement – so this means that …- can clarify rapidly and is noticed as nothing except being sure

• Make notes: get the habit of doing so quickly and accurately (and maybe checking them immediately after a discussion, filling them out somewhat while things are fresh in your mind).

TIP: Remember that few skills are so appreciated by senior people. If you listen to get things right and get them right first time – your ability to influence is automatically enhanced.

3. The power of being assertive

It is also necessary to adopt an assertive approach and make it acceptable. Be careful not to be too strident (it can give the wrong signals, e.g. desperation), otherwise:

• Have the courage of your convictions: only a well prepared case can be presented this way

• Stick to your ground when challenged: and back up what you say with facts

• Avoid circumspection: do not say perhaps we should …when you mean we should certainly do …

• Use tone and manner to reinforce your intention: look and sound as if you mean business

• Do not be put off with bluster: treat a smokescreen as exactly that

• Keep any argument objective and businesslike: avoid emotional pleas or reactions.

Being assertive only means adopting a planned, positive way of putting over a strong case. Senior people will expect you to do so and will respect you for it.

If you are looking for more insights into this topic then download and read “Your Boss: Sorted!” written by Patrick Forsyth.