Boundaries need to clear and understood by the person enforcing them primarily before they can be effectively communicated to others. Not all boundaries are equal and sometimes we are placing boundaries that are ineffective because their purpose is too broad (like a fence around a property) or confusing to others (such as who is allowed where in the boundary building). When we know what the outcome is that we want to achieve, such as behaviour change or to protect our values, the emotional buy in form ourselves is what makes them work.