Assertiveness - Re-claim your assertive birthright

Assertiveness is one of the most important skills you can learn today. It changes the way you communicate, deal with conflict, and your own relationship with yourself. It is the gateway to confidence, respect, and self-esteem. As you will learn in this book, assertiveness is something you are born with and naturally good at. Have a look inside!

Assertiveness is one of the most important skills you can learn today. It can be used in almost any situation at work as well as in your home and social life. Assertiveness changes the way you communicate, changes the way you deal with conflict, and changes your own relationship with yourself. It is the gateway to confidence, respect, and self-esteem. As you will learn in this book, assertiveness is something you are born with and naturally good at. Only the intervention of others with your best interests at heart rob you of assertiveness and teach you unsatisfactory substitutes, such as submission and aggression. But assertiveness is always waiting for you to re-discover its magic. If you are someone who feels they have lost their way in their relations with others, this book will show you how to claim back your birthright.

Preface

1 What Is Assertiveness?
1.1 Dictionary Definitions
1.2 Origins
1.3 The Assertive Journey
1.4 Your Self-Esteem
1.5 The Confidence Lane
1.6 The Three Modes
1.7 What Assertiveness is Not
1.8 Outcomes
1.9 Benefits
1.10 Key Points

2 The Origins of Assertiveness
2.1 The Assertive Child
2.2 The Protective Parent
2.3 Our Early Years’ Programming
2.4 To Stay the Same or Change?
2.5 Key Points

3 Facets of Assertiveness
3.1 Winning and Losing
3.2 Assertive Rights
3.3 Acting Assertively
3.4 Speaking Assertively
3.5 Problem-Solving
3.6 Being Nice
3.7 Natural Assertion
3.8 Key Points

4 Applications of Assertiveness
4.1 Responding to Compliments
4.2 Responding to Criticism
4.3 Saying “No” to Others
4.4 Overcoming Shyness
4.5 Admitting You’re Wrong
4.6 Raising Your Self-Esteem
4.7 Expressing Your Feelings
4.8 Key Points

5 Assertive Communication
5.1 Own Your Communication
5.2 Describe, Don’t Judge
5.3 Be Specific, not Generalized
5.4 Three Words to Eliminate from Your Communication
5.5 Making Requests
5.6 Asking for Time
5.7 Fogging
5.8 Broken Record
5.9 Constructive Feedback
5.10 Key Points

6 Managing Assertively
6.1 Co-operation not Confrontation
6.2 Diversity not Sameness
6.3 Fairness not Favouritism
6.4 Power to Do, not Power to Impress
6.5 Openness not Secrecy
6.6 Leaders not just Managers
6.7 Integrity not Dictatorship
6.8 Outdated Models
6.9 New Models
6.10 Key Points

7 Managing Conflict
7.1 Avoidance
7.2 Direct Aggression
7.3 Accommodation
7.4 Assertiveness
7.5 Key Points

8 Social Confidence
8.1 Conversational Openers
8.2 Keeping a Conversation Going
8.3 Active Listening
8.4 Positive Feedback
8.5 Safe Disclosure
8.6 Presenting Yourself
8.7 Avoiding Controversy
8.8 Key Points

9 Assertive Roles at Work
9.1 The Assertive Appraiser
9.2 The Assertive Boss
9.3 The Assertive Chairperson
9.4 The Assertive Communicator
9.5 The Assertive Customer-Carer
9.6 The Assertive Recruiter
9.7 The Assertive Team Leader
9.8 The Assertive Negotiator
9.9 The Assertive Employee
9.10 Key Points

10 Assertiveness Training
10.1 Watch Your Self-Talk
10.2 Use the ABC Technique
10.3 Set a New Trigger
10.4 Anchors
10.5 Musts into Preferences
10.6 Hold On Tightly...
10.7 Work on Your Self-Esteem
10.8 Practise Affirmations
10.9 Practise Visualisations
10.10 Get a Role Model
10.11 Scripting
10.12 Key Points

Web Resources on Assertiveness

Profile of Author Eric Garner
Eric Garner is an experienced management trainer with a knack for bringing the best out of individuals and teams. Eric founded ManageTrainLearn in 1995 as a corporate training company in the UK specialising in the 20 skills that people need for professional and personal success today. Since 2002, as part of KSA Training Ltd, ManageTrainLearn has been a major player in the e-learning market. Eric has a simple mission: to turn ManageTrainLearn into the best company in the world for producing and delivering quality online management products.

Profile of ManageTrainLearn
ManageTrainLearn is one of the top companies on the Internet for management training products, materials, and resources. Products range from training course plans to online courses, manuals to teambuilder exercises, mobile management apps to one-page skill summaries and a whole lot more. Whether you’re a manager, trainer, or learner, you’ll find just what you need at ManageTrainLearn to skyrocket your professional and personal success.
www.managetrainlearn.com